After a winter of rain, clouds, and freaking windstorms (remember that?), the reappearance of the sun can be an almost holy experience for Zags. Paled by months of huddling indoors, students almost seem confused by the bright orb in the sky when it first shows itself. Here are some of the zany characters you’ll run into when the weather is no longer garbage.
1. The Adorable Old Couple
This is the couple that your one annoying friend will Snapchat with the caption #RelationshipGoals. Always smiling and dressed better than anyone else on campus, these two look like what would have happened to the couple in Up if that beginning part never happened. I’m not sure why this couple chooses to spend their afternoons walking around a college campus together, but I’m certainly glad they do.
2. The Group Playing An Obscure Sport
They’re always in groups of at least four people, they’re always on the Herak Lawn, and they’re always playing a game that’s too hip for you to have heard of yet. Whatever they’re doing, whether it’s bouncing a ball off of a tiny trampoline or throwing a Frisbee at a stick, they look like they’re having a blast.
3. The Person That’s Basically Naked
Even though it’s only 50 degrees out, this person is set on the whole “Sun’s out, guns out” philosophy. This guy is probably shirtless and in shorts that would make a basketball player from the 70’s cringe. There’s nothing technically wrong with their wardrobe, but it’s an interesting choice for how cold it actually is. They’re probably from Washington where 50 degrees is boiling. The opposite of this person is…
4. The Person That’s Wearing Way Too Much Clothing
It’s finally 80 degrees out! Wait, why is that guy in a sweatshirt? Is she wearing a scarf? Is he in a parka? That can’t be comfortable. I mean, you shouldn’t judge people on how they dress, but that just can’t be comfortable. They’re probably from California.
5. Groups Of Touring High Schoolers
After February, it seems like Gonzaga controls the weather to make us look good when touring high school students visit our campus. Whenever the weather gets over 60 degrees I swear there are at least 80 high schoolers on campus at any given time. As soon as the weather drops, they all vanish. It’s almost beautiful.
6. Like, 90 Longboarders
In the winter it’s easy to dodge the occasional longboarder as they come flying around the corner. In the spring, you might as well just give up. It’s like the old saying goes: “If the weather is colder, you’re safe from longboarders; if the sky is clear, be full of fear” (ancient English proverb, probably). There’s a chance that at least one of them will hit that adorable old couple, which is as funny as it is sad (very).
7. The Gnats
Yes, I’m aware that the “gnats” are actually blue wooly aphids. Whatever they are, they get in everybody’s way, they travel in packs, and they make me scared to go outside when it’s sunny.
Huh, I guess they’re kind of like longboarders.